Friday, August 14, 2009

Everything you want to know and then some plus 37


1. I am scared of basically everything. Including Fish, Birds, Spiders, Snakes and enchilada cheese.
2. I wish I had a southern accent. Like, really bad.
3. When I was little I would pretend I was a waitress, a Police officer or a Genie.
4. When I was 5 I convinced my Aunt my floral pajamas were an outfit and wore them to a fancy restaurant.
5. I get tired of things after 6 months.
6. I won best author in 3rd grade with a story about a can of magic beans that make you toot. No kidding.
7. I am attracted to men that have big snouts.
8. I dislike the word ‘sexy’. So much I have stopped dating someone who says that to me.
9. It makes me uncomfortable when a person doesn’t make eye contact with me.
10. I never finish my drinks. I don’t know why.
11. I can never seem to screw the lid on to the Orange juice correctly.
12. I lose the toothpaste cap. Every time. AND I squeeze from the middle.
13. I want 2 children.
14. I would like to own a pot bellied pig named Lola.
15. I really wish the O.C. was still on television.
16. I want to write a book. I have no idea what to write it about.
17. In 9th grade I puked during our class panoramic picture. On the cutest boy in school.
18. In 8th grade I fell in front of the ENTIRE school while dancing to ‘Yellow Submarine’
19. I have a thing for drummers
20. My boyfriend’s house is haunted. The ghosts name is Chet. I think Chet is an asshole.
21. My mother caught me smoking when I was like 11. She made me eat them. My father brought me candied cigarettes as a joke. My mother hit him with them. I didn’t smoke again until I was 24.
22. My imaginary friend’s name was Penelope.
23. I had a cat named Poo who ran away. I was convinced he ran away to the North Pole to eat snow. He really ran away because I would put him in the toilet and stuck him down my diaper.
24. I would pour my spagettios down my diaper too. I guess to save them for later.
25. My favorite song when I was little was Boy Georges “Coma coma coma Cameleon”
26. I had a crush on the kid form the Goonies and pretended I couldn’t breathe so I could have an inhaler too. I couldn’t convince my doctor.
27. I pretended I fell while rollerblading. Made up the entire thing and the doctor took X-rays and put on a pink cast. I soaked it off in the hot tub 3 days later.
28. I use to tell people that my Mothers orange Kool-aide mustache was her accessory of choice. You know, like your CTR ring.
29. I use to wear a CTR ring to fit in on the playground. I had no clue what it meant.
30. I played Puck in a Midsummer’s Nights Dream.
31. I want to go to Thailand.
32. I love Brussels sprouts.
33. I have been stung by a bee twice. Each time I stepped on one.
34. When I was in a car accident at age 5, I hit my face on the wind shield. I wasn’t wearing a seat belt because I was wearing a pink hula hoop dress and didn’t want to crinkle it. I kept shrieking to the paramedics “My poor beautiful face!!”
35. I use to play an old Monkees Record on my grandmothers record player over and over and over to ‘Day dream believer’
36. My grandfather taught me how to ride my bike.
37. I was convinced I would marry Joey McIntyre from New Kids on the Block.
38. My old boss waived a shotgun at me once in a bar parking lot.
39. I knew I would Love my boyfriend the minute I laid eyes on him
40. I was married for two years. Then I met my boyfriend.
41. I am only competitive when it comes to how cute I look compared to other women.
42. I think Whiskey tastes like a grandfathers burp.
43. Farts make me laugh.
44. I think Family Guy is the most creative television show ever produced.
45. I want to be cremated. Note: If anyone puts me in an open casket I will haunt the hell out of you!
46. I would like to live in another state for awhile.
47. I wish I had a boat.
48. I rarely make the right decision. (Perhaps it’s because I don’t wear that CTR ring)
49. I love my car.
50. I could be a cowgirl.
51. I take slutty women personally.
52. I don’t care much for Oprah.
53. I wish I lived on the set of the Brady Bunch.
54. I wish the Jetsons and Fragel Rock were still on television.
55. Halloween is my favorite holiday. I don’t know why. I get upset every year at the fact that finding a costume that doesn’t resemble a Las Vegas call girls apparel is out of the question.
56. I like to drink wine from regular cups.
57. I plug my nose when I take shots.
58. I can’t say pneumonia or aluminum right
59. I get car sick if I look away from the road
60. I am a prude. Or so my boyfriend tells me.
61. I have never seen my mother and step Dad kiss that goes for my Grandparents to.
62. My mother told me I looked like a ten cent hooker once when I wore red nail polish. I have never worn it since.
63. I wish I had never cut my hair.
64. I bore easily
65. I was born without patience
66. My right pinky toe is miss shaped.
67. Tommy Hilfiger cologne smells like wet quarters to me.
68. I ate octopus once and it stuck to my tongue.
69. I was locked in a trunk.
70. It grosses me out when people lick things. Popsicles, envelopes, ice cream etc...
71. I cried in the movie I am Legend
72. Eternal Sunshine for the Spotless Mind is my favorite film.
73. I have a girl-crush on Jennifer Needles, the lead singer from Sugarland.
74. I have a regular crush on Robert Downy Junior. Oddly enough my boyfriend looks absurdly similar to him.
75. I think we should have a country wide nap time every day in the middle of the day like Spain and Mexico has. We should also be able to drink wine for lunch.
76. I love ethnic food.
77. I have never owned a big girl purse. Only tote bags.
78. I had my tongue pierced for 1 whole day.
79. I attract addicts.
80. I think Red bulls taste like wet smartees
81. I think I look terrible in Black
82. I like to copy other people but hate when someone copies me
83. I kill plants when I try to grow them
84. I can’t make Minute rice or mashed potatoes
85. I am not a very good decorator
86. Women usually don’t like me very much.
87. I am very animated
88. I am an unorganized Virgo. I think it’s because my Dad teased me so much when I was younger about being a Virgo.
89. I enjoy scheduled spontaneity
90. I don’t like it when things don’t go the way I wanted them to.
91. I want to one day go to the airport and buy one of the only available tickets to wherever it is going and go.
92. I love Yoga. But lose focus.
93. I don’t enjoy Breakfast foods. I usually eat cheetos and a Dr Pepper.
94. I loved sushi until I drank a bottle of Saki and puked it all over the dashboard of my car.
95. I love to watch Crime T.V.
96. I don’t like Harry Potter.
97. If you wan to piss me off wear socks with sandals and take me to Wal Mart.
98. I hate waiting in lines
99. I don’t think Roller Coasters are fun
100. I played catch with my hamster when I was little and still feel really really bad about it. He didn’t die... but still...

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