Thursday, January 8, 2009

Popcorned chocolate redboxed tires

I had to spend $392.00 on tires. I would much rather have $392.00 worth of cute new T-shirts and ballet flats and britches and necklaces, or perhaps a plane ticket to somewhere sunny.
But no, I have 4 hunks of rubber designed to get me around in this frozen terrain.
Someone hit my Dad and I's stone fence outside our house. It completely demolished it. But it's ok.. We have the horn to their vehicle, we found it in our yard.. How that car managed to drive away I'll never know.. but thank God for Karma because they won't be able to honk at passer-bys or Assholes that cut them off or any other fences that happen to get in their way.
Moral of those two short stories: I hate winter.
I don't think friends should be allowed to ever say "good-bye" it should be a universal rule like a blood-brother pact or a pinky swear that friends are a forever unconditional thing.
Sour patch watermelons, Dr pepper, Goldfish, Gummy bears, Twix, Movie theatre buttered Popcorn, cheeseburgers, french fries, oven baked pizzas, and Cheetos soothe a broken heart but defiantly does not cure it. The next morning you feel like an elephant is sitting on your guts and you still remember what ailed you prior to inhaling all that junk.
Movies, no matter how entertaining are just not as good without a comfy pair of arms to be intertwined with.
Moral of that tid-bit: I miss a few people. I am experiencing the 'phantom arm' thing. You know, where your arm is gone but you still feel the sensation of it. Except not with my arm but with people. Its like they are still there but yet, they aren't.
One more thing.. If you are dating someone.. not even dating but just hanging out with someone of the opposite sex, never under any circumstance ever say " Are we hanging out tonight? Hope you are ready I am feeling frisky" Chances are the person on the other end of the phone will chuck it right out of her hands,call you a list of every name under the sun, and swear off men for the rest of her existence, delete your phone number and then blog about your idiocracy and lack of respect, tact and over all persona.. " I am feeling frisky" ??!!?? Are you serious? What in the hell is wrong with people?! I don't even think this statement would be ok if you were in a long lasting intimate relationship with a person. Frisky?! * rolls her eyes*
Tonight: another trip to the Red box and I'm trading in the candy for a bag of trail mix..
( ha ha yeah right)

2 comments:

  1. Frisky? Are you kidding me? This has inspired a post of my own about knights. Wait for it... It's coming. Men have become pathetic. Seriously. All of them. What happen to respect, huh boys?

    Rian Paige... It is time to grab your marshmellow shooter, mini skirt and leg warmers and let's get going! No one is worth losing your spirit over and the Rian Paige that I know has spirit for days. You're too good to be sitting at home wanting things back that weren't really what you wanted in the first place. You aren't that girl. The one that sits and lets the world walk on her. You are the girl that starts it all over, lil more sarcastic, Lil more jaded, but a Lil bit stronger. The girl that wont let someone choking stop her from dancing. This will end even if I have to drag you out by your hot rod stewart do. Seriously. We need to put our shoes and purses in the middle and dance, dance, dance.

    P.S. You totally need to get one of those trophy boxes and stick that horn in it and give it to your dad for his birthday. Memories.

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